This Food 4 Thought is more like a banquet. It’s a recipe to make life good. Even awesome!
Tell me, have you ever experienced someone upset at you because of something you said? What? You say.
Later, after upset turns toward argument, and you’re off to the races… did you discover that it was a simple misunderstanding? Something like this happens fairly often.
The reasons can’t be counted. But, generally, it’s people speaking in a way that assume others know the topic; or perhaps it’s due to people not saying what they mean in a way that is clear.
Of course, it’s also due to people not listening with their full attention to what’s said; or even one person or another is just uninformed on the subject. Doesn’t understand. There are many reasons, and they all involve. PEOPLE.
My dad loved people. All people. The ones who were good to him, as well as, the ones who were mean to him, yelled slurs at him, and betrayed him. He just refused to get into an argument with other people. He cared about others so much. Free speech was just too important to him.
People speak to each other for a million reasons. People get together for conversation, debate, speeches, ordering food, Christmas dinner, watching sports, taking a cooking class, visiting your child's teacher, a work meeting or an online chat. We face people and situations every day.
Words might be the number one reason for controversy that quickly leads to a quarrel. One of the reasons to avoid “speech confusion” is how difficult it can be to straighten out the mix-up. It might also take a long time, if ever, for the hard feelings that develop to subside.
My dad had a lot of experience with people, especially people who didn’t like him, or maybe didn’t use their words well. He taught me this lesson that has protected me from my own demise from a “war of words.”
If I hear someone say something I don’t agree with, I don’t respond. I keep quiet. I wait to make sure I am sure what that person meant. In other words, my dad told me “not to jump to conclustions” for three reasons: 1) What I think was said, might be wrong; 2) I could unnecessarily cause a “word fight”; and 3) People might think I’m an idiot or worse.
3. Don't jump to conclusions. It’s unfortunate, people often think the worst of other people. Maybe they don't think highly of themselves, and that self pity, likely causes them to come to the same conclusion, that others don't think highly of them either. So, they snap back with not too nice words.
Consider that maybe some conclusions you reach are just plain wrong. My dad used to tell me:
"If you're not getting the response you expect, look at yourself. You know the tried-and-true saying: What you give is usually what you get. If you want a different response from people, look at what you're doing and saying -- and consider what you’re not doing and not saying.” Simple. Avoid wrong words. Be clear. Keep quiet. Sometimes, not responding is the best response.
Hope Dad’s Wrong Lesson helps you, like it helps me.
You would have liked my dad. He would have made you feel as though you were the most important person he's ever met.
I know he would have liked you.
That's what's on my mind today here at Being Grand. Have a wonderful day. Give someone your smile today.
